As my mother's dementia gets worse, I have realized the importance of keeping a record of the family history. My own memory may not do these treasured moments any justice if I don't put it down on paper. So here goes....
In the last article, I stopped at the point where we settled in Zamboanga where my dad was assigned. My older brother and I were already in school at this point. We were, most likely, enrolled in a Catholic school since both my parents were deeply religious. I remember clearly that both my mom and I as well as my older brother were fluent in Chabacano (a dialect spoken in Zamboanga; it is a dialect that is deeply Spanish in its roots). We led a pretty normal and happy life in this place. One of my happiest memories of Zamboanga was the family trips to the Pasonanca treehouse which had a swimming pool at the bottom of the tree and it was filled with water coming down from the mountain or something to that effect. A few years here and it was time to relocate again. This time the family went back to Cebu.
By the time we went back to Cebu, the family was now composed of 7 kids and our parents. I guess at this point, my parents were more stable financially and were able to buy a home. They owned a building which had 3 apartment and we stayed in 1 of them, while the other 2 were rented out. My mom remained a full time homemaker at this point. There was lot to do...manage a household, feed a family of 7 kids and 2 parents, with usually 2 maids and a driver, and help the kids with school work. It sounds extravagant to have househelp but this was the norm during this time. Nowadays, it is extremely difficult to have this kind of help for one's home. It has much to do with the expense and availability of workers.
The home in Cebu was a simple 3-bedroom house with a bathroom, a toilet, living room, kitchen and dining room on the first floor. I always thought it was more than sufficient and was quite comfortable. We had a black and white television which we enjoyed thoroughly. We had a long rectangular dining table where family meals were enjoyed. Meals like breakfast and dinner were almost always served at the table. The distraction of cellphones were non-existent. As difficult as it can be, I have tried very hard to carry on this tradition with my own family. Mom was always an excellent cook so our meals were quite delicious. This made the need to eat out at restaurants almost non-existent. Our parents probably felt relieved that this was the case as the expense of eating out would be quite a strain on our budget, I don't remember any of us ever complaining about it. The holiday meals especially around Christmas were exceptional. The essentials of life did not seem to be a problem for my parents. Only now did I realize how difficult it must have been for them to raise all of us.
I remember mom mentioning to me that she did have 1 miscarriage. She still managed to add 1 more child to the brood. The youngest one (Norman) was born in 1968. My mom did not want any more children so she asked her gynecologist to tell my dad that it was dangerous for her to get pregnant again. My dad would have gladly added to the family if he had his druthers. But as always, he conceded to mom's wishes. Mom gave me some details of the birth control method they used. She said it was a German type of birth control which used a combination of pills and monitoring of her period. Mom was only 47 when she had Norman. At this point, she was still very capable of having more children. Thank goodness they stopped at 8 kids.
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